Give me another minute to pretend who we are, because you did not give me a chance to kiss you goodbye.
I kept reminding myself to be smart when you first put your finger gently on my bare chest.
“..this is your first time being so intimate with someone, don’t lose your brain..”
“..be strong, take his hand away..”
“..ok may be his warm hand can linger on your stomach, but that’s it, don’t let him go any..OHHHH GOD IT FEELS SO GOOD..”
It was the tension.
The tension when you kissed my jaw and I wondered will you kiss my lips.
The tension when you took off my shirt and I wondered if you like what you see.
The tension when you bit my nipples and I wondered why it hurt so damn good.
The tension when you pressed your body on mine and I wondered if I can pause the time.
I guess you didn’t hear my heart break into pieces when few days later you said ” We were just playing, it was nothing”, but you confused me when you came back to “play” again and again.
How silly of me, thinking we could be together everyday.
How silly of me, thinking you would apologize after accusing me of being slutty.
How silly of me, keeping the door open in case you want to see me.
“..Please, love yourself, close the door already..”
“..you will find someone better, but in the mean time, you will have tonnes of sad songs with you at night..”
But how, how do I forget you?